Living together before marriage is becoming more common among many couples, and the question of whether it is good or bad is on everyone’s minds. There are many things to consider before you move in with your partner.
First, you both have to be on the same page and examine your intentions. Know why you’re living together in the first place. Is it to see if you’re compatible in the same house? Or because you and your partner are avoiding marriage?
You both have to have an honest conversation about why one or both of you want to live together without getting married first.
Maybe one of you assumes that the other wants marriage while the other disagrees, or one thinks it’s just a serious relationship and hasn’t thought about marriage.
In other words, you and your partner’s minds have to be in sync; if not, it can cause problems later on. So, let’s delve into the pros and cons of living together.
Is living together before marriage good or bad?
Pros
- Reduces stress after marriage
Living together before marriage lets you know your partner’s good and bad habits, so you can get used to them or even change some of them before you eventually get married. Imagine if you have never lived together and got married to see some of your partner’s annoying habits. But if you have lived together beforehand, there will be fewer surprises.
- Sharing finances
This is a prevalent reason couples live together before marriage. It would make sense to stop paying different rent, electricity bills, and others when you and your partner would be in the same house most of the time. While this is an advantage, you’ll have a lot of money to spare, and you might be tempted to squander the extra money. Open a joint savings account instead so you can deposit all the extra money there. Then, you’ll have an emergency reserve when you get married.
- You build a stronger bond
Intimacy is essential in any relationship, most especially marriages. Intimacy is not only physical or sexual, but there’s intellectual, experiential, and spiritual intimacy. When partners live together, they learn to be intimate on all levels, which is good for a healthy relationship.
The Cons
- Lack of support
Whether you are getting married or not, living together is a huge decision, so many challenges can come with it. If you don’t have social support, it can impact your relationship and cause conflict. Everyone has different opinions about various things. It can be difficult to live together without the approval and support of your family and friends.
- You’ll save money, but it can weaken your bond
Although living together comes with joint expenses, conflict arises from who gets to pay these expenses. So, decisions on who gets to pay each expense have to be made so it won’t cause conflict that can weaken your relationship.
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